I hate waiting. Waiting in line. Waiting in traffic. Waiting for that call back. Waiting for five o’clock. Waiting for the weekend. Waiting to graduate. Waiting to get married. Waiting for that big break. Waiting to have kids. Waiting for that dream job, that house, that next big life milestone... We spend our entire lives waiting. And frankly, it sucks.
There hasn’t been a time in my life when I didn’t think, “If only I could do this, then I would be set! I would be happy! I would be fulfilled.” As soon as that blank is filled, out pops another dissatisfaction.
Why do we do that? Why do we live constantly for something greater just around the next corner? Why do we seek self-improvement? Could it be, perhaps, because there is something better?
But how much “better” do our lives have to get before we stop searching? Before we’ve arrived?
The answer, unfortunately, is not finite. There is no “best” life, at least not one that any of us have discovered. Most of us run ourselves into the ground during the search.
The “rags to riches” archetype is deeply embedded in our culture. If only we work hard enough, if only we are kind enough, if only we outbalance enough of our selfish deeds with selfless ones...we can achieve everything we want in this life and the life to come.
We all know how it feels to not measure up. To be passed over for a team, for a promotion, or for a date. To not live up to someone’s expectations, no matter how hard you try. It’s the feeling of swimming upstream with all of your strength, and looking up to see you’ve gotten nowhere.
We scoff when family, coworkers, and pastors talk about contentment. They don’t understand how hard it is for us, to wait and work and hope and yet...never seem to reach our dreams.
Contentment is just a patch, we think, a delusion, temporary painkiller to make us forget about the agony of waiting.
But no. Contentment is not giving up. Contentment is not treating others poorly and demanding they accept us because we believe we are incapable of change. Contentment is not shrugging our shoulders and changing direction when we are blocked or told to wait.
Rather, contentment is embracing the reality of our struggle (and our battle with doubt) with the knowledge that our limits and failures are overcome by Christ. Our own striving does not have to own us and beat us down. It is an avenue of worship, an act of faith, and a testimony to others of our relationship (imperfect as we are) with our Savior. It’s a relationship available to anyone who believes that Jesus was who he claimed (that he died for our sins and was raised for our hope) and is willing to stand with us while we wait.
“Lead me in your truth and teach me, for you are the God of my salvation; for you I wait all the day long.”
Psalms 25:5 ESV